F1 Strategy group make a decision

May 2015

The F1 strategy group, the latest bureaucratic organisation created to make people feel important, has come up with a list of suggestions in order to improve the show in Formula 1. They have basically said they want to revert back to how the sport was in the mid-nineties by re-introducing re-fueling, making the tyres wider and making the drivers start their own race, rather than letting an Xbox do it for them.

The proposed changes come as TV audiences continue to plummet as a result of Formula 1 now being almost as dull as golf. Sources close to the strategy group confirmed that the main topics of discussion were on improving the show and to continue to reduce costs. Re-fuelling was banned at the end of 2009 because the FIA deemed it was too expensive so they forced all the teams to redesign their cars to accommodate larger fuel tanks. It is understood that the huge cost involved in redesigning the cars again in order to allow for re-fuelling and wider tyres will… errr… reduce costs.

After several days of meetings where they worked on their procrastination skills and drank lots of expensive champagne, the committee members finally figured out how to use a pen and made a list, which they hope will be implemented in 2017.