FIA propose ban on haircuts
April 2015
Having banned drivers from changing their crash helmet designs and making them run random number on their cars, the governing body of Formula 1 has now proposed banning drivers from having haircuts that don’t conform to new FIA regulation measurements.
In his quest to stop anything remotely interesting ever happening in the sport, Jean Todt wants to ban drivers from having anything other than a short back and sides during the course of the season as well as banning them from growing any facial hair. Like most of the recent rule changes proposed by the pillocks in Paris, this will not have any impact on the sport as a whole but Todt says it will stamp his authority on the sport and make him feel like an emperor.
Some of the drivers have spoken out against this new rule change as they believe they will be unfairly disadvantaged. Nico Rosberg claims his weekend job as a Britney Spears impersonator would be hampered if he had to cut off his blonde locks. Jenson Button and Romain Grosjean have also both voiced their concerns over the concept of losing their designer stubble. Fernando Alonso has been the most vocal claiming his facial hair grows so fast that, even if he started a race clean shaven, by the end of it he would still look like Gandalf the wizard. Max Verstappen, on the other hand, says he is unconcerned by the proposed rule change because he hasn't started puberty yet.
